I have been teaching for about 20 years
How did you get started in sex/kink education?
It started when Leather Conferences such as Living in Leather, National Leather association, Janus and several private BDSM venues asked me to present. I was on many discussion panels and then started to present BDSM/Kink subject I was especially passionate about.
Are there any topics that you consider your specialty?
Yes and they are all in the realm of BDSM/Kink:
– Flogging from mild to catharsis, timing, skills and energy awareness
– Caning from light to heavy
Both of these specialties not necessarily about punishment games but also about ritual, catharsis and healing
– Play piercing – technique, safety, energy, design, intent, ritual
– Play piercing , needle pull – ritual, healing, connecting, spiritual journeying
– Energy, sensing, breath, moving into a partner body with sm play
– Improvising role-play and keeping some humor about it all
– Scene dynamics, going on a BDSM journey together without script
– Negotiation, archetypes, play persona and role-play
– I also teach rope bondage a la twoknottyboys style
You’ve been a long time educator, leader and lifestyle player. Can you talk about the pro’s & con’s of pursuing a profession in the world of sexuality
Pro: if you are truly called to do it. do it. it is so satisfying to share your passions and help others find their way, find the intimacy and the beauty of consensual erotic explorations.
It is not a chosen path that will make you rich, or provide you with retirement, health insurance , paid vacation. Being an entrepreneur is not for everyone .. burning out can be an issue. and adaptation to new marketing technologies can be really stressful.
Have you seen any changes in the BDSM community education over the years?
Yes of course. There are many many venues, organized BDSM communities with meetings of all kinds, support group of ll types, conferences, contests, on line learning and live in the flesh classes. When I got into the lifestyle there was Janus and that was it, then Outcasts women only. Then Aids struck and sex got taken out of SM. The years of the plague were devastating.. and some of us survived. Now there is a mix of tantra, BDSM and sex. Great! I love that! There also seems to be many more folks interested in M/s… and many broken hearts who have been collared and dismissed….
Since 50 shades there is an explosion of ‘advice’ pick and choose, buyer beware!
You founded The Academy Of SM Arts in 1995, what originally inspired you to create the intensives?
What I learned i learned from experiencing, topping, bottoming, orgasmic sex, pain, rituals, fantasies fulfillment… i stepped into my dominant shoes, my caring sadistic shoes, but also my masochistic heels and got on my knees and made mistakes and took risks. I wanted to teach hands- on in small groups . That is what the erotic dominance Intensives are about. You do not just watch and listen, you do it.
Do you have any pet peeves about sex educators?
My main pet peeve is folks who do not give credit where credit is due. and also bad advise. Like these young woman telling BDSM newbies that they will get kink education on Fetlife. Really, there i a lot there, a lot that can really freak people out.
Encouraging folks to find embodied community, mentors and get involved – not just online exchanges.
Do you have any last recommendations for aspiring sex educator?
You are doing a service to our sex negative society, share what you know, keep on learning, have fun and get paid for your work .